Archive for the 'Rant' Category

• 1.24.06 "Dating my mom…" is posted in Rant, Reflections

I think one of the unique things about significant others is that you can call or email each other twice without getting a response in between. With most people it’s customary to wait a week or two before calling a second time (unanswered)…you wouldn’t want to seem needy and you don’t want to annoy them. But with a girlfriend it’s okay to send them an email in the morning, to pick them up in the evening from work, and to call after you’ve dropped them off the moment they walk in the door. Or to just happen to call a few times a day, leaving a few voicemails. It’s a sign of affection. Sadly the most affectionate person in my life is my mom. (more…)

• 6.24.05 "Be kind if you want him to like you." is posted in Rant, Reflections, Relationships

When I was 15 and traveling through Israel I had a number of debates about the topic of “universal politeness.” I remember arguing with Adam a lot about whether it’s necessary to try to empathize when someone gets hurt or to express gratitude when others do for you. He was against what he considered arbitrary kindness. I disagreed. From then on I’ve always been the one who offers “god bless you” from the other side of the room, because I think it really does make a difference. (more…)

• 3.10.05 "Trusting Others’ Opinions" is posted in Rant, Reflections, Relationships

Perhaps the greatest threat to a relationship is a lack of respect in another’s opinion. The opposite is also true: being able to truly value someone else’s insight on critical topics opens a whole new dimension of communication. Be it a close friend, a relative, a coworker, or a lover–this sort of trust in communication is the building blocks from which relationships can blossom. But it’s so often a missing piece.What’s amazing about relationships is not the patterns of what’s present, but how often particular elements are missing. It’s not so silly though: we seek different forms of connection, and definitions for “friend” or “lover” are as varied as DC weather in March. Some friendships are about convenience, some are about late night conversations, and some are only as long lasting as a given team has games. Other relationships may go deeper, but I believe it’s still somewhat arbitrary which good traits are present. We all know of marriages that were missing seemingly obvious traits…some of which failed and some of which keep trucking along. (more…)