Superstars are Real

Whether it’s the person behind the dais, the lead scorer on the field, or the one you just can’t seem to approach at the party…there are superstars everywhere. Maybe it’s the context where they’re a star, or maybe it’s just that people (cool people, no less) surround them, but when you’re on one side and they’re over there how can you deny their superiority?

Eventually you meet. Sometimes the stardom dissolves. More often they maintain that scintillating charm you envisioned from afar–so poised and so comfortable. It’s not like they have to impress you; why would they be nervous? Heck, they’re always on.

Or so the story goes. For a while. But then you run into them again. And again.

You have a mutual friend. They’re wearing a shirt you own, as well. They’re applying for a job where you used to work. Impossible…

It’s a process, but all people become real…if we let them. We may never perform with the same ease or radiate in the limelight, but there are things we and the superstars share in common. Even more, there are most likely areas in which we’re much more eligible for superstardom than they.

Perhaps we all know this in the back of our minds. But we need to persistently maintain the belief in order to mentally deflate these intimidating personas. Still, it’s not that easy to build confidence when someone seems “out of your league.”

What helps me is to think of the people with whom I’ve grown close. If I were to picture meeting them for the first time, knowing full-well where they are now, I’d be intimidated. My best friends, girlfriends, co-workers, and clients are and have been just as accomplished, attractive, and impressive. Some of them were the superstars before we grew close. Now they’re just real.

The one-dimensional facade that defines superstars is bound to dissolve as we get to know them…but it’s best to remember that time will reveal the multi-dimensional nature of both them and you.

I say all this after a weekend getting to know a few people I’ve long looked up to …and still feeling challenged by others that, from afar, I’ve grown to respect (or idolspize). But when I keep in the back of my mind what my friendships are like and what I have to offer it’s not so hard to recognize the superstar for a little less and a little more–just another person who I’ll find out soon enough if I really want to admire and befriend.