Comments on: Chemistry & Reason in Dating

By: -ben

-ben — Tue, 28 Feb 2006 01:17:29 +0000

eHarmony. Everytime I see that bespectacled, gray-haired, smooth-talking weasel who goes by the name of Dr. Neil Clark Warren on TV, I want to strangle him. When I was tackling the most challenging class of my academic career (until then); trying to make sense of the conceptual, psychological, and historical acrobatics of Homi K. Bhaha; trying to apply Bhabha’s theories to defending V. S. Naipaul’s conservative (even right-wring) writings; my fiancee falls for eHarmony’s pitch hook, line and sinker.

In the middle of my research to draft up a 35-paged thesis for the class, I was suddenly tasked to read page after page of pop psychology and relationship pseudo-babble from the eHarmony site. When I was only getting 3 to 5 hours of sleep a night, I was supposed to assimilate the dribble of this one Doctor Clark and reflect on my relationship. I guess I would have found all these very funny if it didn’t happen to me : P

I called it quits.

If I want drama, I will turn on the tube and watch TNT Channel instead.

Thanks, Doctor Clark.

P.S. If I ever get my hands on a surplus Predator drone, watch out. There’s brimstone coming your way, doc.

By: Jared Goralnick

Jared Goralnick — Mon, 13 Feb 2006 23:12:18 +0000

That’s a valid point; I can’t say for sure just how much of a role my nothing that things happen in one way has reinforced my expectations that things have to happen in that way.

Part of me feels that maybe this is just one thing on a list that’s a sign to look out for. The other part of me feels that this is a necessary for the type of connection I seek out…and if there aren’t early signs of it then who knows when to expect it?

Then again, I’m sure I’m guilty of hoping for too much…and, if nothing else, reading too deeply…

By: kate.d.

kate.d. — Mon, 13 Feb 2006 18:55:16 +0000

ok, that particular eHarmony commercial about chemistry drives me crazy enough – i didn’t know there was a chemistry.com as well. i feel really bad for the suckers that think a q&a on a website is going to find “chemistry” for them. chemistry is the one thing – the one thing that you can’t control for.

jared, i find your observation of how you always happened to go through steps 1-4 w/ emotionally significant relationships interesting. i wonder if, in a certain way, your subconscious is restricting you here. do you think that now, because it’s happened this way in the past, that it must happen in this way in the future for “chemistry” to be present?