How to be Happy?

Life is so good, and then it isn’t. What changes? Why is it that we can go from feeling pleasant to dreary without anything changing? Why is that there are times when moods offer no connection to reality? Perhaps our emotions are really just neurochemical reactions that can get processed incorrectly, like yummy cookie dough baked for too long.

I don’t want to think that it’s all chemicals, but I do know that every little thing has to be just right. The recipe for happiness is a difficult one, in that it doesn’t work every time. Life isn’t like cooking, studying, or exercising; once you’ve figured out the formula, it’s not just a matter of repetition. The ingredients themselves change, and thus we can never be fully in control of our state of mind.

So what’s the solution? The solution is to surround ourselves with things that are reliable and to minimize the variables. Some people find that having lots of places to turn to is the answer. If one thing fails, don’t worry about it now, there are better things to do. Other people try to keep things simple by assuming few responsibilities. With little to look after, it’s less likely that there’ll be many surprises.

But neither of these approaches are guaranteed. When there’s a lot on your plate you might not finish it. And when there’s only a little bit of food, you might get hungry. We see both of these all the time. We all know people who never seem to have a minute free, and we know others who are perpetually bored.

Isn’t there a happy medium? No. Am I unhappy? No. Am I overjoyed? No. Sometimes there’s stuff to do and we want to do it but it doesn’t make us happy. And I’m not just referring to grunt work; anything can come in too great or too small a quantity.

That we’re all governed by different rules is one of the most fascinating and perplexing things about people. I can’t solve this quandary for myself, so I certainly can’t answer it for you. But I feel a little better having given it some thought. Now I’m going to go back to moping around and working on my thesis and playing guitar and dancing. What’s your recipe?