Having Separate Spheres in your Life

I knew a girl last year who shared an interesting trait with me. We both enjoyed having a lot going on in our lives, but not just to stay busy. We wanted things to turn to when something went wrong. I guess it was a good idea, because when the two of us didn’t work out we both managed to go on with our lives.

At that time I had dance. And when my last relationship ended it was the same thing. I remember running outside to the hop in the car with Jason and Anna to go dancing, after a very long phone conversation. Gotta love Friday nights at Swing City…but I digress.

Dave put it best, “it’s all about being a Renaissance man.” Bob said the other day, “you’re becoming quite the stud with the guitar and dance and all.” And today, talking with an old teacher, a new friend, I thought again about how many separate things I have going on.

Is it a good thing to be pulled in so many directions? Is having something to turn to a sufficient motivation? Should I be able to use dance to make me happy? Is it fair to run away, to differ, to dillute your troubles?

I don’t think it’s a surprise that I’d say yes. I’ve watched many of my friends develop passions and take advantage of them. It beats drinking, and our friends can only handle so much. Even more, people aren’t always around… and they’re not always what we need.

Another of looking at this approach is “it’s nice to have stability…somewhere in your life.” Ideally I’d love to have a relationship that provides that, but it seems like that’s the least stable element these days.

But hey, it’s important to build up a repertoire while I’m still young. And like I said earlier, it’s somewhat nice when those things can be distinct, separate. It’s good to cherish something… and yet to be able to walk away.

I don’t know that that’s a good philosophy, especially when applied to people, but sometimes we have to make choices with people, too. Sometimes we even grow out of our closest friends. I’m not saying that’s happening. All I’m saying is that when all else changes, and it will, that I want to have something to turn to. And I will.