Direction and Mastery

It seems like people need to have _one_ talent. I just watched an episode of the Jazz series that’s been on these days; over and over it told stories of people so incredibly passionate about an instrument and music. It seemed as though they knew that jazz was what they wanted to pursue, and consequently they focused so much time on it. I’m amazed by Louis Armstrong, Duke Ellington, etc., but at what point did their dreams come clear?

Maybe I’m just the typical college kid wondering what to do with the rest of his life. And maybe my impatience just makes the quest seem more important to me. But it’s not that I haven’t found anything I like, it’s that I can’t seem to decide on one.

Sure, there’s nothing wrong with pursuing multiple things. But it takes a lot of time, a lot of money, and it’s very difficult to progress at many things at once. If I could just pick one and drop the rest it would be nice. But I love computers, I love dance, I love reading, and I love girls (defintely not in that order…). And I’m beginning to love playing an instrument, taking pictures, traveling, being depended on in organizations… But how can I have time to practice guitar, dance, and work on a program all in a day?

And it gets worse. There are different technologies I want to focus on in computers. Right now I have an idea for a program that I think would sell, possibly make a name for myself… but I don’t want to pause in dance, especially as I’m starting to travel in the next few months (London, maybe San Francisco) with dance as the main purpose. I don’t know which activity is getting out of hand… (sometimes college feels like another detail…)

Maybe this is all just too much information; I don’t really know if you care. But it seems like there’s too much out there. Couldn’t things just be simpler? In a few years I can’t wait to look back on this and the decisions I made, in awe of how they somehow took direction. I can’t wait…